Older Is Bolder
Plus five questions I want to know about aging.
The older I get, the more simple of a life I crave. I’m so worn out seeing article after article around how to age gracefully, ways to slow the aging process, why everyone is dissolving their fillers, what the latest cutting-edge skin treatment is, etcetera etcetera. In this youth-obsessed culture, it’s easy to dread or fear each passing year, and as I round the corner to 40, I’m learning to carry my grief a little more lightly. I’m finding more awe and joy in everyday life, I’m laughing hysterically and I’m crying harder. I am feeling both confusion and uncertainty while also experiencing a deeper knowing. I’m feeling connected and like I finally belong, and I’m also wondering what my place is in all of this — or if it’s really any of my business to be asking that question in the first place. It’s both/and; it’s always both/and.
There is a physical, societal “disappearing” that tends to come into the conversation around women as we age, but with every decade of life arises new wisdom, confidence and a certain kind of beauty not afforded by youth. Instead of defending my limitations, I want to invite in curiosity, expansion and possibility.
I may have more pronounced 11 lines these days, but I also feel a greater power and freedom from within. Getting older is a privilege and I don’t want to take it for granted. My arms are wide open welcoming a life that others may or may not understand. I’m learning that what I look like is less of an issue, and what I am seems to be the point.
Aging is a topic that I find so very layered and fascinating, and
and I are working on a special podcast on this very subject. In order to make the episode extra meaningful and varied, I’ve got a big ask… we need you to contribute! All stories will be shared anonymously. It doesn’t matter your age, gender, life stage — we’d love to hear from you. Ask your kids even, or call your aunt and press record!We are collecting voicemails through our Plain View hotline (side note: I’ve cried every time we’ve received a voice message 🥹). I know it can be scary to make a phone call, but I promise it will go straight to the voicemail box. Easy peasy. If any of the below questions resonate for you or bring to mind something personal, I’d love to invite you to share by calling (925) 247-VIEW. Don’t forget to include your age, too!
When did it feel like your life really began? Or are you still waiting for this feeling?
What do you want younger people to know about the age you are now?
What are you nostalgic for, or what is one of your favorite memories?
What has surprised you the most about growing older?
What is something you’re looking forward to — big or small?
If a voice note feels too intimate, you can respond directly to this email, send us a DM @plai.nview or email us at plainviewworld@gmail.com.
Can’t wait to hear from you!
With love,
Elise
NOTEWORTHY
—81-year-old Carly Simon offers some “beauty tips,” lol. More of this, please.
—
and I are halfway through season one of the podcast (Episode 5 is a favorite and came out last week), and we’re taking a brief intermission. Let us know if you have any topic recommendations or questions!—“Every form is difficult, no one is easier than another. They all kick your ass.” James Baldwin is talking about writing with The Paris Review in 1984, but it feels much more widely applicable than that.
PLEASURE
The Gramparents Instagram account always makes me so happy. How cool is she? And how iconic is this guy?
I’m SO late to the game (27 years to be exact 😂), but I’ve finally started Sex and The City and… I’m hooked. It’s fun to see NYC in the 90s — so romantic — and reminds me of my old hobby.
Cameron Winter is a 22-year-old recent discovery, and I can’t stop listening to his genre-bending, captivating tunes. He somehow sounds like he’s existed forever.
CONTEMPLATING
Fashion Neurosis with Bella Freud and Susie Cave. I could not be more obsessed with this show, and their relationship is such a testament to the power and longevity of female friendships.
Bowen Yang Is Number One. “I think the thing about your 30s is that you have to start facing yourself. It’s such an eye rolly thing to say.” Woof, but so true.
How To Be A Happy 85-Year-Old (Like Me). I had sweet, happy tears in my eyes reading this charming piece by Roger Rosenblatt.
Photo Credit: From The Overview: Meditations on Nature for a World in Transition by photographer Ben Toms.
Rounding the corner to 50, I can tell you that the 40s have seemed to be a very rich time for most of my 40-something friends and me. There's a beautiful acceptance that grows around physical characteristics and perfectionism/needing to be good at everything.
It is very strange becoming invisible after getting a lot of attention in my youth - it does feel weird and a little yucky to be less conventionally attractive. But I like how youth and beauty are getting less important and other aspects of life have more room to grow and be celebrated.
Exactly this ❤️